the struggle is real, BUT so is God

I'm having a HARD week. As an overly empathetic person who FEELS sorrow and frustration of others as her own, I'm super struggling.

Two separate close friends experienced the death of a parent at Thanksgiving. My long time mentor and friend also died this week. A family member recieved a scary devastating diagnoses.  Then last night eating boiled potatoes, I broke a tooth. I just had 2 temporary crowns placed on the opposite side of my mouth. So I have no side to chew on.  

I'm overwhelmed,  and stressed.  

In an act of faith and relationship building I turned to the word of God today. With verses in mind. You know those feel good verses... those 'name it and claim it' verses. 

‭‭Romans‬ ‭8:28‬ ‭; 1 Thessalonians‬ ‭5:18‬ ; Philippians 4:13

‭‭Romans‬ ‭8:28‬ ‭

 We know that all things work together for the good of those who love God: those who are called according to His purpose.

‭‭‭‭1 Thessalonians‬ ‭5:18‬ ‭

 Give thanks in everything, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.

‭‭Philippians‬ ‭4:13‬ ‭

 I am able to do all things through Him who strengthens me.

But I felt that part, the one we too often we ignore. You know the feeling, the gentle nudging 'ok but read deeper'

So before we hear in Romans that everything works for the good, we are told how. 

‭‭Romans‬ ‭8:26‬ -27

 In the same way the Spirit also joins to help in our weakness, because we do not know what to pray for as we should, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with unspoken groanings. And He who searches the hearts knows the Spirit’s mind-set, because He intercedes for the saints according to the will of God.

So when I am in my weakness, I'm not alone.  When I can't even think to pray, GOD himself prays for me. He groans with me.  He intercede for His own will in my life. So that it can work together for His good. 

And the context of Thessalonians.. 

‭‭1 Thessalonians‬ ‭5:12‭-‬22‬ ‭HCSB‬‬

 Now we ask you, brothers, to give recognition to those who labor among you and lead you in the Lord and admonish you, and to regard them very highly in love because of their work. Be at peace among yourselves. And we exhort you, brothers: warn those who are irresponsible, comfort the discouraged, help the weak, be patient with everyone. See to it that no one repays evil for evil to anyone, but always pursue what is good for one another and for all. Rejoice always! Pray constantly. Give thanks in everything, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus. Don’t stifle the Spirit. Don’t despise prophecies,  but test all things. Hold on to what is good.  Stay away from every kind of evil.

Is all about the relationships that help you give Thanksgiving. The relationships that are deep enough to call you out in love when you are not living a life of Thanksgiving.  Relationships that will encourage you in your sadness,  and will help you in your weakness. I don't have to find the Thanksgiving to give, my relationships will be along side me lifting me up with Thanksgiving. 

And what about Philippians? The✨️magical✨️ ability to all things? 

‭‭Philippians‬ ‭4:11‭-‬12‬ ‭HCSB‬‬

 I don’t say this out of need, for I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I am. I know both how to have a little, and I know how to have a lot. In any and all circumstances I have learned the secret of being content — whether well fed or hungry, whether in abundance or in need.

The ability is to suffer. To be in God's service even in the hard and uncomfortable.  Even in the derision,  and the pain. To be ok with the nothing,  because the end is  the beginning of forever freedom in heaven.  WITH GOD. am these things that have me down will vanish.  I won't be sad at the deaths, because those who love the Lord and recognize His diety will be with me there.  And my broken tooth will not matter in my new glorious body. 

This is a hard season,  but it's just that a season.  A season to grow relationships,  a season to grow contentment, a season to let the Holy Spirit Himself pray for me in my pain. Isn't that a comfort.  

The struggle is  real...but GOD is  faithful, good, and here with me.  

again...what's in a name?

The story of Leah is one of my favorite stories in the Bible. 

Specifically the story of her children's birth. 

I've read it I've written about it I've studied it still today I learn more. 

I've always loved how she named her children. God saw me so he gave me a son Ruben which literally means Behold a son maybe my husband will love me now

God heard me so he gave me a son I'll name him Simeon, which means to be heard but again she turns to maybe my husband will love me now.

God knows me and that I'm lonely so he gave me a son and I'll name him Levi which means to be United together but again she turns to maybe my husband will love me now

But then she bore another son and even though God had seen her, and God had heard her, and God had given her love and children to love and be loved by she still was missing a connection a personal connection and she longed for that with her husband who did not want her initially did not agree to her initially she was in a marriage of opportunity and even though she was the one who was producing the children for him she still knew she was second to her sister. So would this son change that relationship between her and her husband? She didn't hope for that anymore, she realized the connection she needed was between her and her God. So this time she named her son Judah and she said I will praise God. 

And her mind and heart change she went from being consumed by the present to being consumed by the eternal and praising the God who is with her through her circumstances. And through that child God set up his kingdom here on Earth and our salvation through Christ because it's through the lineage of Judah that we get the Davidic line. 

I just love the use of our names and how much power names have.

She went on to forget and go back to "maybe my husband will love me now" because our Earthly connections are important to us and it's hard for us to remember to keep our eyes on eternity. by the time it was all over she'd bore six Sons (Issachar, his reward will come; Zebulun, dwelling of honor) and one daughter and how special that daughter is because she is spoken by name in the Bible historical record of a woman, Dinah, whose name means Justified, to be made right by God. 

Such powerful names that went on to be the tribes. 

That's all that's all I have for today I just love that once she realized she needed to praise the Lord instead of seek Earthly things God used that son and his descendants to bring us forgiveness through salvation in Jesus Christ.

what's in a name?

Thank you Sunday School and BSF.... 

I'm watching Veggie Tales with my kids, specifically "Rack, Shack, and Benny", when the narrator says that's "Rack, Shack and Benny... well that's not their real names, let me see if I can get this right their real names are Shadrach Meshach and Abednego."

Not me pausing the movie to explain to my children that "actually those aren't their real names either....those are the names that they're remembered by sadly. But those aren't their real names, when they were abducted and put into slavery and exiled their names were changed. Those aren't their real names, those aren't the names that their mommy gave them, and those aren't the names that God calls them. Their real names are Hananiah, Mishael, and Azariah. It's important to remember their real names!"

"Ok mom can we watch the movie now? 

Sure.

But for my friends... meanings of their Hebrew names Hananiah – God has been gracious; Mishael – who is what God is; Azariah – God has helped. Each of their names pointed back to the Hebrew God the one true God. Meanwhile their new names Shadrach – inspired of Aku; Meshach – belonging to Aku; Abednego – servant of Nego, all were false Babylonian gods. Babylonians were trying to make them into worshipers of a false god, but they remembered who they truly were and they remembered God called them by their true names. And when they were thrown into the furnace God knew who they truly were and who they truly worshiped. 

::chills:: 

No matter what everyone around you calls you remember who you really are and what your name is to the one true God. 

who do I trust to watch my child

When autocorrect puts you on the correct footing. 

Today I was looking for a GPS for my kid, some kind of air tag tile something or other, that I can put in her backpack or on her shoe. So that I can have control, or at least a false sense of that. 

As I was typing it into my third search engine it auto corrected my GPS to God. 

I smiled, kind of laughed, pushing it off. The third time I typed it in.... autocorrecting it to God again. I took a breath and realized YES, God you've got this covered. Your eyes are always on her, you've counted and loved every hair on her head, you've carefully knit her together in my womb, You know her steps, her to and fro, You collect her tears in jars. There is no where she can go that You won't know. My job is to raise her to love You, to seek You 1st, and to love others more. 

My job is not to worry, not to fret, not to hold tight. My job is to trust You with my child as Abraham trusted you with his. 

Thank you auto correct for that today.

Psalms 5:21

Luke 12:7

Psalms 56:8

Proverbs 16:9

Psalms 121:8

Psalms 139:13

Hebrews 4:13

Matthew 22:37

Genesis 22